The truth is this. This year, I broke it.
My goal for the year was my first million, a ton more books published, more businesses formed and founded under my online biz empire.
NONE OF IT.
And I didn’t even notice.
That’s my admittance. It totally slipped away and through my fingers and I didn’t even notice.
Because that’s how it happens, isn’t it? We slowly slip into comfort. Into understanding that something is so wonderful, and that of course it is never going anywhere, because well, who wants to destroy that fairytale?
Nobody wants to think about the un-happy ever after.
I’m talking about business, but it’s true for everything/ the way we love / our health / bodies / the way we parent / our approach to wealth / our intellect even.
It runs like grains of sand through our fingers and we love the sensation and then it’s gone.
We take it for granted that it will always be easy and wonderful until we reach the realisation point- in fact many never do, just the numbing realisation that this hundrum everyday part of our lives is so definitely not what we signed up for-
This halfway point between passion and no-mans land and it doesn’t take genius to realise which one we are sliding further and further into-
And then when we realise, often, we leave. Switch off mentally, stop loving, withdraw into fear.
And there is no beauty in the breakdown because often there is no true breakdown it’s just a slow everlasting descent into what we don’t want and when we recognise it it’s too late and we feel powerless to stop it, which is why manifestation books are so popular – and THEN it’s the breakdown. Too late.
We would do everything to wish it away-
Everything short of the MASSIVE and giant action and sometimes incredible painful action needed which propels us out of our comfort zones.
And I know you know what I mean. I know you’ve been guilty of it too.
Whiling away the days, the moments, pretending that only the Now matters. Like it’s only the Now that’s important.
Without anything significant to aim for though, how can we possibly expect what we do in the Now to have any focus or direction, or be anything other than comfortable?
And that’s where I lost it.
Sat in my comfort zone. I even took what I thought were big massive risks- closed down a program I no longer felt connected to, got rid of clients who were no longer the right fit, opened up vulnerably and publicly on my sites.
RISKS??? How frankly laughable, that I saw those things as risky decisions!!!
Risks are operating your business from a place of thousands of debt and continuing to invest anyway, risk is setting up a brand new business when one has failed, risk is marrying someone that everyone tells you not to because you know it’s right for you, risk is continuing on when you’ve been too broken to even contemplating continuing, risk is putting all your money into hiring an expert even though it might mean you can’t pay for your house next month and putting your entire family at risk- firing clients who aren’t right?!?!? closing down online programs that no longer feel great!?!? I totally kidded myself those things were risks!
They weren’t RISKS at all, they were full-on NECESSITIES with zero risk involved!
And the thing was? Everything is so comfortable! I thought it would of course! naturally continue to grow. The 5* travel all over the world, VIP one day trips to NYC for exclusive high end masterminds, working with my own clients in VIP venues, list growth in the thousands.
We don’t find happiness in the comfort zone. We find ourselves at a standstill. Inbetween neither one, or the other. And we find ourselves in the comfort zone when we believe in our own BS. Because we dare not open our eyes to what MIGHT happen, further down the road.
Last year I mistakenly thought I would wake up this year and be a multi-millionairess. I assumed, now that money making is easy, it would just fall into my lap.
I assumed that by now, seeing as I find content creation probably the easiest thing to do in my business, that I would have at least 30 books on Amazon. Maybe (probably) even a publishing deal.
And a TON of publication credits, obviously.
I was full of the same old BS and excuses that I had been when I was earning ZERO!
AND WORSE I assumed that I didn’t have to do what it takes, that it would just be so easy and would all fall straight to me!
I forgot to build
I forgot to plan
I forgot to look at the big picture
I forgot to leverage
I forgot to invest
I forgot to work INTENSIVELY on that non-stop chattering monkey mind
I forgot to expand
I forgot to take the REAL risks, the ones that are REALLY scary, that mean leaping over and over and over again
And yes of course my list was still growing yes of course I’m still earning but the TRUTH is I’m nowhere near where I imagined I would be by the end of 2016 which yes was a pretty massive leap unimaginable for most people except you and I but still…. where is it??
I forgot even to keep CREATING!
Sure, I wrote my children’s book. Sure, I created new courses and programs. Sure, I wrote more posts. Sold more.
Continued to grow and expand and actually to MOST people it looks like I’m insanely busy, in fact I get many clients messaging me saying ‘sorry, I know you’re so busy but…’ but the reality is I’ve only been operating at a tiny fraction of what I’m able to.
Reality? I forgot to create what I know my business empire is supposed to look like.
I chose not to write the books, build the websites, run the REAL programs that I know matter and make the real difference, invest in certain things both offline and off.
And then – thankfully – and quite possibly by pure accident, I got a bit bored of not having created something that has been on my mind for YEARS now and so I finally kicked myself into some sort of small action;
Then I realised in the process of creation, in taking that step back to plan and dream for a bit – that piercing realisation that you’re on the last train home to wherever it was you came from in the first place.
Not en route to where it is you originally intended.
And that’s why I’m sharing this with you. It was such a revelatory point, such a wake up call and a fast dose of reality that made me sit right up and pay attention and THANK YOU GOD that I had it because otherwise there could of course be the danger that I could wake up in a year or so with at best being in the exact same position I am in now, which in all honesty, is not a bad place to be, it’s not like I am moaning about my life whatsoever and to be honest my life is actually pretty fabulous, but I definitely plan on keeping it that way and GROWING.
Coasting, being comfortable, riding on easyness is not the route to where you want to get to. It’s the route down. And to even just stay where we are right now, at this point, we need to ensure we are growing.
Every single week my husband and I, without fail, have date night together. Every morning we have coffee together. We generally have three meals a day together. We tell eachother we love one another multiple times a day. Even after five years of marriage with two children very close together and working in the same place together, he leaves me love notes lying around the house if he goes away for any length of time. And of course we still argue! Just nowhere near as much as we used to.
My marriage is the single most important thing in my life (alongside my faith) – little surprise my marriage continues to grow stronger and calmer and full of more love and connectedness and greater understanding.
We mess up the way things are supposed to be, the things we dream of, when we don’t work at it, take up comfortable mode, and stop looking forward at the bigger picture, instead coasting on everything we have NOW.
(I talked a bit about this over on my FCA site on my new podcast ep! – How to plan your soul-fulfilling and successful 2017- check it out here)
And the two most important things we can to do stop the slowdown, the invisible decline?
This isn’t about beating yourself with the guilt stick. It’s about recognising complacency and taking action on your life in the things that truly matter.
Where have you been coasting, and complacent? what is it going to take for you to make that difficult transition into action, to break old habits, take big risks, make new habits, form new beliefs and patterns? What’s it really going to take, for you?
Every step we take, we make the choice to stay where we are or to choose a new reality. Because right now, something might be breaking. And the danger is in not even recognising it in the first place. That’s the reality, that right now, so many of us choose.
Until we choose something different.
Love and Light
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